Sorry I’ve been a bit radio silence this week. It’s been a doozie.
My Great Uncle passed away suddenly a couple of days ago. He was a preacher, a dedicated father, and a devoted husband. He was always so kind and so devoted to his work for the Lord, doing for others even at times when he wasn’t in good health. He was truly a wonderful person and he will be missed.
It’s so strange how loss shakes us up and makes us really evaluate our lives and priorities. Yesterday was my first day off of work without any commitments in weeks. Will has finals this week so he was planning on packing up Flora and Lexi and taking them to Charlotte to spend the day with their Mimi. I had planned on spending the day cleaning (why does my house never stay clean???) as well as drafting a couple of posts for my poor neglected blog here. Maybe even working on a vlog.
Then I looked down at Flora, who was peacefully napping, and realized how much she has changed over the course of just a few weeks. I realized that I have been so busy that I honestly didn’t even notice. “They’re staying with me today,” I told Will.
He responded with, “but you won’t get anything done and you’ll be in a bad mood.”
Yeah, well. My daily routine as of late has been get up, frantically get everyone ready and out of the house, go to work and deal with people and being on my feet all day, come home, try to get food on the table, bath time, bed time, maybe do some laundry. Days off recently have been spent registering myself for school, attending a sidewalk sale, and trying to deal with the annoying nagging adult things that we all deal with from time to time that kept me away from home. I spend all day every day doing and get myself anxious and worked up because I have myself convinced that it’s not enough. I needed a day to reconnect with my child and to get to know the newest member of our household.
That’s not to say the day was perfect and picturesque. Flora’s getting over a virus and getting molars so she wasn’t in the best mood for some of the day. I may have snapped at her for trying to feed the puppy a grocery bag. Sometimes Lexi pees when she gets excited and she gets excited every time we put the leash on. Laundry continues to go unfolded. I have an eczema break out and it’s affecting my selfie game. Will and I argued over time management because we are both so busy and there is never enough time.
Even with all of that (and a still messy house) I woke up this morning feeling a little bit more content than I had been before. I still have a million things to do all day every day but it feels more manageable. I’m trying to be easy on myself and allowing myself to enjoy the little things instead of beating myself up for not being perfect at everything. I’m trying to show some grace to myself.
Do you make a point to show yourself grace? How do you go about doing so?